Friday, June 22, 2007

The Viking/Judeo-Christian Conflict - Part 1

Today is Day 50,839 of the Maintenance of the Immoral (and Illegal) West Bank Settlements and more than 140 years since the start of the immoral (and illegal) occupation of the West Bank and Gaza.

Rabbi Akiva - “ ‘Love your neighbor as yourself’ (Leviticus 19:18) - this is the major principle of the Torah.”

MarbleSwamp - June 22, 2107

THE VIKING/JUDEO-CHRISTIAN CONFLICT

Background

Summer returns but still no peace here in the West Shore and the Naha Strip. How did we get to this point? Could it have been prevented?

As you know, in 2047, based on the continued violence and discrimination against the Vikings in Scandinavia and the rest of Europe primarily because of their adherence to Norse mythology and opposition to Judeo-Christian traditions and their view of Vinland as their ancestral home, the United Nations voted to accept a new country called Vinland into that body.

Vinland originally included much of the land in what used to be southern Essex County in Massachusetts in the United States. In 2067 after twenty years of violence between the Vikings and the Judeo-Christians (“JC”), Vinland’s borders included all of the former Lynn, Peabody, Danvers and Beverly.

There continued to be dispute over Salem, revered both by the Vikings for its pagan history and the statute of Elizabeth Montgomery and by the JC for CafĂ© Kushco. For 40 years the former Salem has been a divided city – Salem is the Viking western part and East jeruSalem is JC.

In 2047 and 2067, many JC fled to East jeruSalem which has since been annexed into Vinland. Others became refugees in the former Marblehead, Swampscott, and Nahant where no Vikings lived and which, although occupied by Viking forces, has never been annexed into Vinland. One area is referred to both as MarbleSwamp and, because of its proximity to the ocean, the “West Shore.” The other, once called Nahant is now referred to as “Naha” and, due to its narrow length, the “Naha Strip”.

The United Nations has passed numerous resolutions demanding that Vinland end its occupation of the West Shore and Naha and agree to the establishment of an independent country to be called Christianjudia.

In 2068, a small group of fanatic Viking fundamentalists, who had emigrated to Vinland from Nanortalik, their village in Greenland, and were led by Olaf Ericsson, announced that they were going into MarbleSwamp for one day for a festival in honor of Odin. They refused to return to Vinland, took over the former Temple Israel and established the first Viking settlement in the West Shore. The lawyer for the prime minister of Vinland advised that such a settlement was in violation of the Geneva Convention. His advice was ignored because of the groundswell of public support for Ericsson who proclaimed that the temple was the site of Valhalla, Odin’s hall and that the entire West Shore was, indeed, Asgard, one of the nine existing worlds of Norse mythology.

Since that day, there has been continued violence and battles between the nearly 400 JC and the 25 Viking settlers in the area. The settlers, who believe that Odin has promised them all of Asgard, attack JC's and destroy JC property. The Viking Army soldiers have been criticized for failing not only to arrest the settlers but even to restrain them. Moreover, in order to insure the safely primarily of the Viking settlers, the government of Vinland has taken over the entire intersection of Puritan Road, Humphrey Street and Atlantic Avenue as well as 30 JC house lots adjacent to the Valhalla settlement. In addition, the roads leading to the Valhalla settlement from Lynn, and Salem – including Humphrey Street, Puritan Road, and Salem Street - have been set aside exclusively for Vikings and the JC are prohibited from traveling on these roads.

Over the years, more and more Vikings have moved into the West Shore and established settlements on Ida Road in Clifton, on Devereux Terrace, next to Fort Sewell, adjacent to the Tedesco County Club, near Crocker Park, next to the Eastern Yacht Club, on Puritan Road, on Salem Street, near Jackson Park, on Burrill Street and in Vinnin Square.

Vinland continues to receive large amounts of aid from the government of the United States while the leaders of the West Shore and the Naha Strip receive very little. In order to protect itself from the threat of attack from those in the West Shore or the Naha Strip or from JC supporters in Lynnfield, Saugus, Wenham and Gloucester, Vinland has established a highly trained, technologically advanced, mechanized army, navy and air force (including modern tanks and attack helicopters) with massive superiority over the rocket launchers and rocks of the JC. At times there have been uprisings and acts of violence by the JC which have been met with swift and brutal retaliation by the government of Vinland.

The JC’s goals are to end the occupation, dismantle the Viking settlements and establish an independent country in the former Swampscott, Marblehead and Nahant but their efforts have been hindered by the growth of two factions – the first are the Marbles whose basic philosophy seems to have been taken from certain Judeo-Christian teachings including the Torah as well as documents from the country it used to be part of - the United States. In the infrequent interviews that usually appear only on the Paganista TV station, they will be heard to say phrases such as “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” Most of the violence and attacks on Vinlanders are blamed on the Marbles.

The other JC faction is the Swampies. For many years the leader of the JC government of West Shore and Naha was also its revered Swampie football coach. There was little progress towards peace and independence under the Swampies since most of the foreign aid received during that time was diverted to support its football team which always won the annual football game against the Marbles held on the Judeo-Christian celebration called GivingThanks. For a number of years, the Swampies would accept an invitation to play for the regional championship against the traditional powerhouse team from Boxford, but with the inability of the bus to use Humphrey Street and Atlantic Avenue, the team could not leave the West Shore.

In order to further combat violence by JC, the government of Vinland has begun building a twenty foot wall between the West Shore and Vinland. JC protesters say that the wall is crossing over the original 2067 border to include a Viking settlement on Salem Street near Tedesco Country Club. The club was taken over in 2085 by the Vikings claiming it was needed for security purposes but within two years it was converted to a center for the exclusive use of Viking women for handball and shooting.

For over forty years the government of Vinland has claimed that it wants peace and that it supports the establishment of an independent, continuous independent country of Christianjudia. Every decade or so, the government of Vinland agrees to sit with JC representatives but when there is an act of violence, it accuses the leaders of JC of not doing enough to stop the violence, announces that the government of Vinland does not have a “partner for peace” and terminates the peace conference.

Deuteronomy 16:20 – “Justice, justice shall you pursue that you may live and inherit the land which God gave you” and the footnote in the 1980 Hertz Edition “(T)here is international justice, which demands respect for the personality of every national group, and proclaims that no people can of right be robbed of its national life or territory, its language or spiritual heritage.

2 comments:

htobinlambert said...

Absolutely brilliant!!!

npro said...

verbose but insightful