Wednesday, August 15, 2018


It Did Happen Here

Ronald W. Fox

April 20, 2039

Tomorrow is my 100th birthday.  The key to my home in the village of Marblehead, Massachusetts, hangs on my wall. I wonder who lives there now. Someday I hope that my descendants will again be able to return to my house and live there.

Was it really just 19 years ago that the 2020 election was canceled? The then current United States President declared himself Czar Donald 1.

Soon, thereafter, he appointed Pastor John Hagee as Minister of Racial Health. Every member of the Jewish community should have been alarmed knowing since Hagee has referred to Hitler as a half-breed Jewish descendant of Esau and says the disobedience of Jews to God gave rise to their persecution for centuries.

Many of the leaders of the Jewish community were silent or urged caution knowing that Hagee was a huuuuge supporter of Israel (because the bible says that when Israel is invaded by Russians and Muslims, God will destroy them, the Messiah will return, those who believe in Jesus will be taken to heaven and those who don’t (me and my family) will be Left Behind as the world is destroyed in a global conflagration).

Within weeks after Minister Hagee declared New England to be the White Anglo Christian Keystone Outpost (WACKO), Jewish organizations armed themselves and fought valiantly but were overcome by Hagee’s militia.

The violence and brutality of his militia forced us to flee our homes, but we were able to take refuge in northern Maine where we were quickly surrounded. Soon thereafter with funding supplied by Mexico and equipment provided by Caterpillar, a wall was built and we were trapped. The area became known as the Aroostook Zionist Action Grant (AZAG) Strip.

Soon thereafter we began to organize politically and militarily to fight against the Czar. With support, advice and guidance from Jimmy Carter, we held an election for delegates to the newly formed Hebrew Aid Members Armed Society (HAMAS) with Risay Tafara as our first president.  Upon hearing that there was an attempt to establish a democracy within WACKO, Czar Donald 1 immediately imposed a blockade of the entire AZAG Strip.

Within a few months we were no longer able to obtain sufficient water, electricity, food, medical supplies, building supplies or any other of the necessities of daily living.

Despite our pleas to the UN and the EU, nothing happened to alleviate our plight.  On top of that, the Czar had negotiated with the new Canadian Prime Minister, Unjustin Falsedoe, to extend the blockade along the Canadian border.

While I was worried about throwing out my back, I worked with others in the “Marbleheaders” Unit to dig a tunnel into Saint-Pamphile in an attempt to find and bring back bread and eggs. Sadly, Hagee’s militia found the tunnel and destroyed it.

We continued to fight back by building hurling potatoes over the wall but our resistance was met with attacks from helicopters, missiles, drones and armored vehicles.

Unemployment reached 80%.  Children were suffering from malnutrition. On rare occasions, some were able to exit through one of the checkpoints connecting us with WACKO. The process was time-consuming and humiliating. In some instances, pregnant women lost their children because of the time consumed trying to enter WACKO on their way to the Boston No Abortion Hospital Complex. 

We were also extremely upset when one our high school graduates with 1550 on her SAT’s and a full scholarship to Bowdoin College was not granted permission to leave AZAG. When she complained, two of the militia tore her from her parents and took her crying hysterically to a former brig in Portsmouth, Gilead, oops, I mean New Hampshire.

Finally, in late 2038, with AZAG no longer being inhabitable, we had had enough. We called for a peaceful protest at the Danforth Checkpoint.

All went well until someone catapulted strawberries causing a rash on the nose of one of Hagee’s militia. 

At that point Hagee’s militia began firing through the checkpoint fence, killing 30 and injuring 1400 men, women and children.

A New York Times reporter, Christian White, interviewed members of Hagee’s militia and concluded they had acted in self-defense. Another reporter, Roland Hedley, formerly of Doonesbury reporter (see attached report from him) but now with Fox News, suggested there might be two sides to the story and that this might be a case of apartheid and possible ethnic cleansing but the NYT quickly reassigned him to Myanmar.

Minister Hagee promised a full investigation.

Czar Donald 1 applauded Hagee’s militia for their restraint and Hagee’s commitment to peace with justice.

The majority leader of the US House, Donald Trump, Jr., from the newly formed Nationalist Party, also praised Hagee’s militia and asked “How would you feel, what would you do, if thousands of terrorists stormed your wall.”

How WOULD you feel? What WOULD you do? 

P.S. Please don’t try to send me a birthday card. Hagee prohibits all mail for fear that it might contain coded terror messages and won’t allow us to connect to Net and Yahoo.

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